The Stages Of Life

As humans we start this life much like we end it - crawling, incoherent and shitting our pants - such is the circle of life. The following is my scientific analysis on human life in a nutshell...

Life In A Metaphorical Nutshell

You have probably just read my learned piece on The Stages Of Life. And, presumedly, loved it very much, throwing bouquets of roses from the balcony with a tear in your eye in admiration. That's natural. If you haven't read it yet, you should. Or wait for the movie starring Jason Bateman and Celia Paquola and save yourself the hassle of reading.

In it (unless it was cut from the movie version) you will remember the well-known turn of phrase I had regurgitated in the name of journalism. That is, the one about life in a nutshell.

Of course, no one lives their life inside a nutshell. Unless you happen to be a nut. 

A Poem: My Turn

My Turn

By Ronnie Peace

[A Poem about Australia's newest Prime Minister, 2015]

Malcolm before

Mal come again

Malcolm's turn now

Turn bull to PM

A butt of the joke

Abbott of the spill

Tony down to knee

The odds shorten, Bill

A Labor of love
A Liberal amount
The votes have come in
But the Greens won't count

Bishop to Rook

Hockey one, Hockey two,

SCRATCH

The Two Ronnies

When my good mate Ronald McDonald and I get together hilarity generally ensues.
(and hopefully when his McSolicitors get a load of this, they don't on-sue me)

Oh, how we laugh.

To Celia: A Poempology

To Celia: A Poempology

By Ronnie Peace

(A poem of apology, of which I would also like to apologise for this here poetry)

A Poem #2: P(r)o(s)e

Poetry

Oh, Po-e-try

A Poem: Who Am I

O'er 'ere's a clue

The Black and White Noise

In every person's life they have, at some point or another, experienced what is called 'the talk'.

Whilst I was not watching anything at all on the magical television box at an irrelevant time in my life I inadvertently delayed in pressing the 'up' channel button while flicking and was momentarily left on a show called 'The Talk', which left me confused, irritated and with a pounding headache.

Games to Play in Public Swimming Pools

Fancy a dip? If it's in a public swimming pool then it's a lucky dip if you'll come out alive.

Revealed: The Secrets To Flat-Pack Furniture Instructions and Installations

Good evening and welcome to "How To Design Instructions For Flat-Pack Furniture Installations"...

...Sorry, what is that my Mexican friend in the second row? No, señor, "English 101" is down the hall - HOWEVER, we strongly encourage you to do this course prior to any learn-to-speak-or-learn-to-write-in-English classes. In fact, it is a recommendation of this course that you not be fluent in the language of the country that you design flat-pack instructions for.